Normally, I'm against all of that superficial crap like getting your hair done or getting a facial, etc because I think it is dehumanizing as a woman and when I do it demoralizes me.
However, yesterday I went to a salon with my mother to get a pedicure and our eyebrows waxed for my sister's wedding. I have never had my eyebrows done so it was a new and very scary experience for me. Afterward, I looked at myself in the mirror and I looked so different. It was almost radical the way I had changed. The sad thing is, he only person who is going to notice this change is me. No one else is going to notice the subtle difference in my eyebrow shape or size. No one else is going to notice that my toes are cutely painted.
So it made me wonder why did I even do it?
But I think I finally understand.
It doesn't matter who notices, as long as you feel beautiful. I don't need someone's approval. The fact that I feel pretty and have spoiled myself after a long week of self loathing and depression is all I need. Now, I can continue this week feeling better about my physical appearance, which gives me more confidence.
I know a lot of people chastise women for all the beautifying things we do, and many guys say they don't care if you don't look perfect and that they like girls' "natural faces" but that isn't why we do it. I'm not trying to impress anyone but myself. And guys do notice that something is different, they just can't make out what. And this is what is so perfect about it. These little changes have such a huge difference for my mental health, and the subtle changes are what catch people's eyes.
Anyway I don't know why I wrote this or what the point is but I'm just saying that sometimes one needs to make themselves feel beautiful because if you can't love yourself then no one will.
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